I have a problem with getting still.

When I’m faced with a situation and not sure what to do or believe, a friend told me to get still and listen to my gut–that it knows.

But I have a problem with getting still. 

When I am still, the silence can be agony for me. When I wait for an answer to an important question, a text reply from someone, or a response from an on-line blog on a piece I submitted, and sit in silence, it can be agonizing. When I am still, my mind makes up all kinds of stories to fill the silent space. 

Maybe I’m not worth a response.

Maybe I’m too needy. 

Maybe I’m too pesky and ask too many questions. 

Maybe my writing is not good enough. 

“When we are in pain, we create a narrative to help make sense of it”, she states. 

The stories that bubble up are neither healthy nor helpful. They may also be inaccurate. Still they persist.

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