A Curious Question #15: Do intentions matter and if so, to whom?

Photo by Ross Sneddon on Unsplash

I heard a story about intentions the other day that went something like this:

On a busy intersection, an elderly woman struggles to cross the street. A man walks by and sees her. He wants to help, so he offers his assistance and she crosses the street safely.

On different busy intersection, another elderly woman struggles to cross the street. A man who would normally not stop to help sees a beautiful woman on the other side of the street. He offers his assistance to the elderly woman in the hopes of impressing the beautiful one.

In both cases, the net results are the same. An elderly woman made it across the street safely. But the intentions behind the result were very different.

So the question I have for today is this: Do intentions matter and if so to whom?

If I was the elderly woman they don’t seem to matter. Either way, the help I needed arrived and I crossed the street safely.

If I was either man, I’d like to think intentions matter. After all, our intentions behind what we do shows our character. Our intentions reveal who we are on the inside.

If I was the beautiful woman looking to find a good man to date, intentions would matter greatly. I’d like to get to know the first man rather than the second.

That’s my quick and simple 2-cents answer.

What are your thoughts on this one? I invite you to share your own 2-cents.

Advice from a Recovering Benefit of the Doubt Giver

I’m a recovering benefit of the doubt giver. 
I’ve given someone the benefit of the doubt more often than I should have.
I’ve given someone the benefit of the doubt even after my spidey sense had perked up, made me pause and think–wait…what?
I’ve given someone the benefit of the doubt even when they clearly weren’t being kind or didn’t share my values. 
Why?
Because I’m also a recovering people pleaser. 
Let’s just say these two traits haven’t always been a winning combination for me.
So, I’m in recovery.

I was set on this recovery path by a quote I recently discovered from Maya Angelou:

When someone shows you who they are, believe them; the first time.”

Continue reading “Advice from a Recovering Benefit of the Doubt Giver”